CHAPTER 50 SRI HANUMANJI AND THE EGO OF BHIMSEN

Man suffers only because of the ego, and into a degree ego is reduced, into the same extent you feel relaxation, you become very sensitive, you become friendly to your surroundings. And when it is totally disappeared, you become one with the whole existence.

Ego is the last and the greatest barrier in the spiritual path. The moment you transcend the last and finest point of your ego, the last extremity of your "I" ness, God becomes realized. Nothing can stop you from universalizing into Absolute Bramhan.

Whatever method of meditation the guru teaches you, it does only one thing. It refines your ego -refines, refines. It becomes subtle -more subtle. And in each state of refinement, your way of looking at the world changes.

Your dealing with your friend changes. Your degree of enjoying the joys of the world increases into deeper peacefulness.

And when through the spiritual practice, the ego is totally evaporated -your enjoyment becomes unlimited, unbounded, perpetual. Different circumstances of the world cannot disturb your enjoyment at all. In that increasing degree of enjoyment you become liberated. That is why even the nature, even the great masters make a great effort to finish the ego of some chosen one.

Chosen one's are those who have taken shelter at the patronage of the wisdom of one's own spiritual master. As much as the surrender is deep the ego evaporates. If there is some delicate or difficult point in the ego, the master breaks it. But it is done only to some surrendered one. Not to others. Others can feel offended -they may lose faith. So only chosen one's are operated on. This is mercy of the master. This is great mercy of God. If the master does not do it, an astral yogi does it. Otherwise, God Himself does it.

Bhimsen was one among such chosen ones. And Hanumanji operates on it in a very, very, interesting way.

After receiving benediction from Lord Pashupatinatha in Nepal, Arjuna went to the planet Svah to receive special education in archery and esoteric weapons. The four brothers, Yudhisthira, Bhima, Nakul, Sahadeo, and the wife Draupadi, were waiting for him, residing in Badrinath on the Nara Narayana hill of the Himalayas.

One day, the wind blew in and an extremely aromatic and beautiful, blue lotus flower from the astral land of the Himalayas fell upon the flow f the river Alakananda. It flowed on, and when it reached near Pandava's ashram, Draupadi picked it up, highly surprised and captivated by its beauty and perfume. She showed it to her husbands and wanted some more flowers like that.

Bhimsen walked out, placing his dreadful mace on his shoulder, in search of the flower. He walked up and up the steep slopes and found a mysterious, deep silence. Since he was possessing ten thousand elephant power, being filled with ego, he was roaring again and again, echoing all around. It was so loud that his voice was echoing all over the hills and dales, valleys and jungles. It scared all animals and the elephants, boars and tigers started running towards the denser forest.

The whole of the Himalayas were like a playing field for Hanumanji. At this time He was sitting on one of the hills nearby, absorbed in the remembrance of that lotus-eyed, long-armed, large-chested, Olympian King Sri Ram. His heart was full of joy, so much so that He was unable to contain it, and His heart was overflowing in the form of tears. He heard the roar and knew why the beasts were escaping. Although Hanumanji had not seen Bhimsen before, yet He knew that he was His own brother, born by the mercy of the wind god at the end of the Copper Age.

He felt compassion for this innocent brother who was ignorantly moving towards danger land of the Himalayas. Bhimsen did not know it. Because of his great enthusiasm and loud roars, huge chunks of ice would break off and fall down upon him. Hanumanji also became conscious that Bhimsen should not encounter the Yakshas (a special superhuman race of Himalayan dwellers) who could either dangerously harm or insult him.

So Hanumanji, out of compassion, laid down on the narrow little path leading to the mysterious part of the Himalayas.

Bhimsen arrived there and saw that to the left and right there were steep mountains, and between them there was a narrow little path which was blocked by an old golden-haired monkey looking being. There was no way to proceed except by jumping over that insignificant looking, sleeping Vanara. So in order to awaken Him, Bhimsen roared and roared.

Hanumanji looked at him and said,

"I am old and sick, sleeping peacefully in silence. You are a human being and you appear to be intelligent and literate. Why did you awaken Me? Human beings cannot proceed any further. You may be prosecuted or misled by the astral protectors of this land. Where do you want to go?"

"Who is asking You the way?" Bhimsen replied in an unhumble, crude tone. "You just get out of the way and let me go."

"Look, here are many sweet fruits and roots. Eat them and rest and you will be more powerful. Then you can go back from here. Who are you to come to this inaccessible part of the world?" Hanumanji asked.

"I am Bhimsen, son of King Pandu, born in the dynasty of the Moon," And getting tired of talking to this useless being he said, "I don't need Your suggestions. You know now who I am. Show me the way."

"I have already told you that this path is not open to human beings. You may run into danger," Hanumanji said.

"Don't bother for me. Just move over a little," Bhimsen persisted.

"I am feeling too sleepy, I cannot get up. You jump over My body and make your way," said Hanumanji.

"By jumping, Sri Hanumanji crossed the ocean. I can also jump over this mountain, but God resides in every living being, so it is against the law of reverence of life to cross over any alive soul," Bhimsen replied.

"Who is Hanuman?" Hanumanji innocently asked.

"The Messenger of Sri Ram, the Son of the wind god. In the search for Sita He leapt eight hundred miles across the ocean. He is my elder Brother. Just move Your tail, even that will be sufficient for me to pass," Bhimsen replied.

"I am unable to move any of the limbs. If you are in a hurry, kindly move My tail by yourself and make your own passage," Hanumanji said.

Bhimsen bent low and with the fingers of his left hand tried to throw away His tail, but the tail did not move. He used his right hand carefully, but the Monkey's tail did not move. He put his mace down on the ground and tried again within both hands. He applied his whole power, got hot and perspired, and began taking long, deep breaths, but the tail was so mysterious. It didn't move one tiny bit.

Then he stood with folded hands and said politely, "Please excuse me for my imprudence. If You feel me worthy, please introduce Yourself."

"I am Hanumanji," He replied.

"In this wilderness?" Bhimsen was surprised.

"It is not really a wilderness. So many astral musicians, dancers, and nature lovers from other planets have made their residence all around here. They satisfy My heart through singing the pastimes of Lord SitaRam. By the blessings of Mother Sita, all the enjoyments I require are arranged and presented by devas, gandharvas, and apsaras, and since they cannot move freely among human beings, I also stay in this area. The Sougandhika lotus you want is quite near here. Its lake is there on the outside of the hill. Stop marching upward. This area is occupied by the beings of other planets," Hanumanji said politely.

"It is my great, good fortune that I saw the lotus feet of my revered elder Brother," said Bhimsen, and he fell down at the feet of Hanumanji.

In answer to his request, Hanumanji described the various mystic incidents of the Ramayana. When Bhimsen heard about the huge, gigantic form of Hanumanji by which He leaped the ocean, he wanted to see it, after all Bhimsen was a power-lover.

"Don't wish to see it. In this Copper Age, neither you nor anyone else, even a human being, cannot bear the great luster and effulgence of that superhuman form. Man's capacities and higher faculties have been considerably reduced. The degree of higher values of human life has gone down," Hanumanji explained. "Why did it happen?" Bhimsen asked.

"Because Dharma is the root cause, the very basis of memory, physical strength, endurance, and capacity to face the bliss. Dharma also influences the size of human beings. From the Golden Age until now, dharma has considerably reduced. And this has shortened the size of man. Now you can not even face My enormous size I exhibited at that time. I am afraid you may lose consciousness," Hanumanji explained lovingly.

"I cannot move without seeing You in that powerful form." Bhimsen had a very stubborn and innocent personality, he clasped Hanumanji's feet and insisted.

"Well then, look," Hanumanji said, and He willed, and within a moment, a blinding, dazzling light flashed throughout the space, and Bhimsen saw that he was like a tiny little creature in comparison with the enormous size of Hanumanji, Who was larger than even the Gandhamadan hill, at the foot of which they were standing. It was shockingly wonderful and scary. The manifestation of extreme power, extreme velocity, and limitless strength is always frightening. In its natural state it looks dangerous.

The dazzling, sharp, piercing light emanating from Hanumanji's face was so powerful and so scorching to the eyes that Bhimsen ultimately closed his eyes. And His loud roar was so deafening that Bhimsen closed his ears. He perspired and began to tremble. It was almost the same situation as when Krishna showed his cosmic-form to Arjuna in the beginning of the Mahabharatam war.

"That's all, that's all my Lord. Please return to Your previous calm and quiet form. I am unable to see Your horrifying eyes, terrible jaws and scorching luster," Bhimsen screamed.

Hanumanji appeared in His small, peaceful humanly form and began to smile, but Bhimsen was still trembling with folded hands.

"Oh, I wonder why Lord Ram fought with Ravana by Himself when He had such an enormously powerful minister as Your Good Self at His disposal?" Bhimsen asked Hanumanji.

Hanumanji is a practical person and did not give him a theoretical reply.

"That will be talked about later. First I want to present you some gift because you are My younger brother. I don't want My visit to be fruitless for you. I think due to the wickedness of Duryodhana, your kingdom has been robbed off, and your wife was insulted. What do you think?

"If you allow Me -I am going to kill Duryodhana with all his brothers, or arrest him and throw him at your feet? Or I can dash a whole mountain down upon his capital, Hastinapur, and destroy it for you. Any one of these you may choose. I want to do something special for you. I love you. You are My brother," Hanumanji said, and began to observe the changing lines of

Bhimsen's face.

Bhimsen became serious and kept quiet for a moment. Then he said,

"Revered Brother, be graceful to me. That is all I want from You. As far as enemies are concerned, by Your grace we shall destroy them."

"My dear brother," Hanumanji smiled,

"In the same way My Lord Ram wanted to destroy the Rakshasas Himself, and since I and many others were His servants, we wanted to glorify Him, we wanted to spread His fame, not ours. I could have killed Ravana, it is true, but it would not have been so adorning to the Lord's pastimes as it has become when our Lord Himself has done it." Hanumanji explained the situation and Bhimsen was very happy.

"Look, there shines the footpath to Sougandhika lotus lake," Hanumanji pointed out the way with His finger.

While Bhimsen was looking in that direction, Hanumanji disappeared.

Bhimsen was at a loss. He looked all around, searched everywhere, but could not find his elder Brother Who was so generous and compassionate to him.

Remembering the wonderful meeting with Hanumanji, Bhimsen walked towards the lake.

"Whenever you are in danger, remember Me --I'll help you."

Great yogis convey this message at times through outer ether or inner ether, the voice within. Hanumanji was also telling this to Bhimsen, who was in deep remembrance of Him.